Astonishing Antipodean Antics

Previous legend || Astonishing Antipodean Antics || Next legend

Koalas are Bums

Debunked: Koalas are always stoned/drunk, as they eat alcohol in eucalyptus leaves.

There is actually no alcohol in eucalyptus leaves, and koalas do have several very good reasons for sprawling about in the tops of trees when tourists are looking at them.

A. "Koalas appear drunk or lazy because they have developed a low-energy lifestyle to compensate for their extremely low-energy diet. The 600 to 800 grams of eucalyptus leaves that koalas eat each day provides them with as much energy as one serving of breakfast cereal does for us." [Phillips, B.(1990)]

B. Koalas, being arboreal vegetarians in a land with no native tree-climbing predators, have never bothered to develop speed or grace - they tend to lurch about because they're built that way.

C. Koalas are nocturnal and naturally require about 18 hours sleep per day - so sprawling with slitted eyes through the middle of a sunny day does not actually equate with a hungover desire to watch TV sports in their underwear.

D. It's all part of a huge plot of lies and misdirection while they prepare to take over the world. BEWARE! (See "Conspiracy" in Refs) They've even managed to convince some anarchists that they are the perfect sneak weapon - that they can be controlled - will these people never learn? (See "Pets for Profit: Killer Koalas" in Refs)

References:

• Koalas: The little Australians we'd all hate to lose. (Phillips 1990, Aust. Govt Printing Service,Canberra)
• Conspiracy
• Pets for Profit: Killer Koalas